( ...And there it is. That one, fundamental difference between them. Shin looking for his own part in things. Looking for the choices he made.
While she's just been letting the wave pull her along these last four years. Agreeing to everything she did because it seemed easier than getting into arguments and conversations. Finding the easiest out once her exams were done. The army would have been years of the same. Just following orders.
Her cheeks feel hot, shame and anger burning inside her at all his explanations. The desire to punch the people who made his life the way it is doesn't fully dissipate, but she feels stupid for trying to project her own empty years onto him.
Feels stupider for letting them happen, but that's nothing new. It's not like she doesn't know she could have made better choices. Could have just swallowed down the ache and kept running, instead of spending every day regretting that she quit. )
... Need the loo.
( And so, once more, she'll take the coward's choice in this and dart towards the back before she ends up punching the table or some shit. )
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Date: 2022-07-20 09:00 pm (UTC)While she's just been letting the wave pull her along these last four years. Agreeing to everything she did because it seemed easier than getting into arguments and conversations. Finding the easiest out once her exams were done. The army would have been years of the same. Just following orders.
Her cheeks feel hot, shame and anger burning inside her at all his explanations. The desire to punch the people who made his life the way it is doesn't fully dissipate, but she feels stupid for trying to project her own empty years onto him.
Feels stupider for letting them happen, but that's nothing new. It's not like she doesn't know she could have made better choices. Could have just swallowed down the ache and kept running, instead of spending every day regretting that she quit. )
... Need the loo.
( And so, once more, she'll take the coward's choice in this and dart towards the back before she ends up punching the table or some shit. )