( That's fair. And though she doesn't take his hand when she stands up, once they make their way outside and the idea hits her, Kate's little finger winds around Shin's. )
... I know.
( Follow her. Not that it's very far. They're just going to her apartment building. A quick detour to her flat, because that's not the destination in mind, they're simply going to drop the food off before they head up to the roof.
It's her favourite way to see the city, after all. )
(small victories. his heart is well-guarded, a fence that can't be torn down so easily, so fast, but this is nice. he can appreciate their dynamic, as kate's own walls come crumbling brick by brick. she puts up an act so deep that he is sure she doesn't see how lovely she can be, under her tough exterior... a pity, really.
his own pinky hooks with her own, and he follows without complaint until the breeze of the nightsky floods his lungs at the roof, elbows at the security half-wall so he can take a long look down. maybe she can tell how little he cares about his own mortality, climbing on it to sit, perched, as he takes a cigarette to his lips, fingers caressing the lighter before he burns the tip.
she might notice how his hand remains on the sphere.)
( It can be dangerous to be lovely. To be soft. She has other roles to play before she plays those.
But, she supposes it isn't so bad to not keep all of that front on at 100 all the time. Being on the roof comes with that hit of cold night air, an itching to move and explore, but that's not the point of being up here this time.
So, she hands Shin his guitar, joining him on the edge of the wall with an easy hop and the kind of balance that comes with having practiced that motion plenty already. The sky is clear, starless under the lights coming from the city, but she looks up anyway, because sometimes the endlessness of it all has its own kind of anchoring presence. )
(quite a weird night. powers, affection, volcanic explosions, red knuckles. he might as well end it in a good light. he hasn't really played for anyone so far, aside from jack - and only so he could understand what a bass does, in the first place. his fingers are effortless as they glide and slide around the chords, a happy melody that he just hums the lyrics to himself.
it fills him with wonder, and excitement for the town below, and even deeper he falls in the tune.)
( It's sort of familiar? The kind of song she thinks she heard when she was younger, but not enough to recognise it, not enough to trigger memories of that time. Perhaps that's for the best. Instead, as Shin works his way through the notes, something else comes to life, flickering into the air in front of them in a way that takes the owner of the memories aback.
Bright sunlight, and the red bricks of home. Kate, a couple of years younger, with her head in her phone. A video flickering across the screen until she sets it to one side and nods to herself. Running, forward, to the wall waiting in front of her, and placing her foot on the bricks, pushing herself upwards and grabbing the lip of the wall itself to pull herself up.
That particular rush of success which only comes the very first time you try something new. Giddy and excited, filled with possibility. Forgetting things which came before.
It's easy, from there, to pick out the other good memories: the first time she stuck a landing, flipping off the roof of someone's garage and immediately scarpering from the pissed off owner. Competing with herself on the highest building she could climb up to. Sitting on the safety wall of the multi-storey car park, much like they're doing now.
Bouncing from rooftop to rooftop here in Jigokucho, hands covered in stardust. )
(if he exists where she's from at all, he'd be so much older than he is right now, he thinks to himself with a laugh. he can't even imagine what he would be like, can't imagine how his life would turn out to be... but he touches her, and her emotions are so clear to him as they waltz before his eyes, he can even smell the clay, feel her emotions on her own achievement and the jitters of a new unlocked skill - one he didn't even know she had. he's mesmerized as he sees her, but her own competitiveness pulses a bit in his brain, the images flickering and failing for seconds, but he can still make them out should the image cut for longer.
they're snippets, anyway. too weak to paint the whole rooftop from her own mind, but enough to make him put his hands on top of his guitar, a beaming smile on his lips as he watches the horizon.)
... So, this power thing isn't so bad, right? I think I should be able to control it better... With time.
( It's nice to watch these memories, though Kate would have never expected to think such. After years of practicing, it's easy to forget how far shes come teaching herself parkour. Even if there are scars aplenty on her body from the times which were far less successful, these are the moments that make those scars worth it.
She's smiling when they finally stop. Snippets and flicks though they may be, the effect is almost as potent as actually running a circuit itself. )
You will.
( Of that she has no doubt. That's how most powers work, after all.
And, because happiness lingers, and there's still the echo of a smile on Kate's lips, she adds; )
Looks best up here at sunrise.
( But she may be biased with that one. It's always been her favourite time of day. )
(he definitely is stealing a kiss from the corner of her lips, to keep a bit of that smile to himself, selfishly so. a sober kiss out of everything they've been through today is a victory, after all.)
Of course it does.
(he keeps the rest of his sentence contained in his throat - a question of whether he'll be here in the morning to see it.)
(... interesting, from someone so frightened. anywhere else would require him to use force to keep her steady, but that's not what he is going to dwell on today.)
Kate, I'm serious... I'm not good for people. I'm good for nothing. I'm probably going to disappoint you down the line, you know.
(he isn't even thinking of romance. it's not what this is. it feels more comforting than loving, to him. nevermind his own words affecting him with a hit of nausea, his insult turned against him.)
I've lied to you constantly. Doesn't that bother you in the slightest?
( It's something between recklessness and bravado, with a(n un)healthy dose of "quips avoid real conversations", but apparently that doesn't work, and she frowns as she pulls away.
It's not that it's impossible for everything he's said up until now to be a lie. Kate would acknowledge that herself. But it grows less likely with his new powers throwing memories out there for both of them to see. )
'Cause you told me when you didn't want to talk about something?
( If everything he's told her up until now is true, then she's learned more true facts about him since they've met than she knows about most people. Hell, more than she's told him about herself. )
(she might not have told him much about her, but then again, does she really need to? a blessing and a curse to notice every single detail, the merest change in behavior, the whitening of her knuckles while he spoke to her about reira. the projecting tells him wonders, even if she doesn't say it with words.)
I don't think you get it.
(it's cruel, because to some extent, she does... but he's poking where it seems to hurt, anyway. maybe she'll see it then.)
( How did they get here? It was fun, light. The tension of earlier had dissipated among food and music. And now Kate's finding herself shifting back, sliding off the wall and back onto the rooftop proper, arms folding around herself as she does. )
We're all fuckin' liars, Shin. That's why we're here.
( Liars, thieves, cheats and worse. She doubts hell really pulls in innocent bystanders to fight its faction wars, even if some people here seem to be better at looking like the rose, rather than the serpent under it, than others. )
...Not lookin' for a prince charming, anyway.
( Though, all things considered, he has been pretty charming. But that's not the point of this at all. It's just... nice to have someone who seemed to give half a damn about her.
And besides, she doubts any prince charming would make it through Jigokucho alive. )
(he could be awful. he tries, lord, does he try. he could use his sharp tongue, show her that there's only so much that charm can make up for, but... he isn't sure if he wants to. at the end of the day, he isn't too different from reira. selfish, wanting this to last, even if he might disappoint one more person he really likes... as per damn usual.
this power comes in handy. the flickers are different, now. his 16th birthday, and all he thinks about is just how amazing it will be to spend the night with the person who shares the same date - like the red thread of destiny is telling them something. of course, the jab he gives nobu and his girlfriend's reaction brings out his worst thoughts, he's not above manipulation when it's called for it. annoyance, anxiety - all he wants is to see hachi, and god only knows if she can come. if takumi would allow her.
and speak of the devil, there he is. a fucking asshole, his blood even boils a little in his veins, burns, but shin's amicable until the bomb drops... much like his heart.
he'll let kate watch it. it's her decision, after all, but he's not really looking at it. he won't look at takumi when he's dead, thank you, it was bad enough when he lived and breathed.
... and then, hachi. relief, love, the feeling of being seen and accepted, with his entire being, when his arms snake around her in their hug, the world becoming quieter in the background.)
All these people you've met today? None should look at me. If you want to take a leap of faith and stay in this friendship, you can, but I think... It's at least wise that you make an educated decision.
( Honestly, she's hard to disappoint, she thinks. Hard to to do worse than what's already been done to her. Not that Shin could possibly know that, even if he can read the reactions he's pulled out of her so far. Because knowing what happened means knowing what her world has created.
Knowing why she can see those powers he sparks to life, memories and feelings flickering between the two of them which she only half watches. More than anything, her eyes follow Shin. His reactions. Every twitch of expression, the lighting and dimming of his powers.
And then there's that comment, and Kate deflates. Because, oh man. They've had so much come up about their fucked up sex lives (she won't call it love, because that's never what it was for her) that they haven't even touched that part of the mess. Its own can of worms. But those friends never talked about anything close to this. It was never anything but the drinks, the drugs. The idle chatter and gossip about school things that never really let them know each other.
And then she betrayed all of them, or so their side of the argument went. Why'd you stop hanging out with us? Is the whore too good for us? Slag. Those words still come up, were whispered in the blood rain, pulling her back to fights in the hall and teachers shouting after her as she leaves the building.
She draws in a breath, and lets them fade into the same meaningless din they were back in the rain, before reaching out and...
Lightly slapping Shin's shoulder. )
What were it you said earlier? You chose t' do shit?
( The actual quotes don't work well in this context, but the sentiment does. )
I'm choosin' to do this.
( Maybe it's a particularly intense show of faith, given how short a time they've known each other, but it doesn't feel wrong. She's stupid, but she doesn't think she's being stupid here.
Besides, if she is, what's one more heartbreak? One more thing lost in her life? )
(full circle. she asked him before, and it's true, none of his choices he regrets. from leaving the greenery of sweden to trading it to the concrete jungle of japan, from living under ryoko, who he cannot hate, to be devoted reira, whose fondness to him was a diversion to her, but nevertheless, real.
he elected all of these, even if some of them were atrocious choices, it's not like he can just go back and re-do them, and he wouldn't. he shouldn't even dream to take katherine's choice from her, but then again - at least now she knows the level of fuck-up he is.
( A simple, and true, statement. It could have been so easy to tell him to just go, to board up the pieces of her heart peeking through the wall and simply pretend they never so much as spoke.
Sue her, she actually enjoys spending time with his cute ass.
But this night has been a long one, and as much as Kate does enjoy the fresh air and the world above the city, something has broken in the air like heat giving way to summer rains and shelter seems a better option. )
'M goin' back. ( A shrug as she steps past him, heading to the door. ) Y'can crash if you want.
( Or stay up here, or head home. She's made her choice here, and now Shin can make his. )
(he needs some time to think, so he doesn't follow her. his fingers scroll through his contacts on his phone, but there's really no one else he can go for comfort other than kate herself. strange, isn't it? to be free and not have his person to call when he wants to hear gentle words, even if they're unrelated.
eventually, he makes his way to her place. he's silent as he strips his leather jacket, his belts, his choker, bracelets, the chain that connects his lip to his ear... it'll take a while, here.)
( She doesn't know what she expects, but she leaves the door unlocked anyway as she returns to her tiny little starter apartment. Pulls her hair loose, tosses the hoodie over the armrest of her couch and pulls a flask of water from the fridge.
And the door clicks open. Her gaze slips over, watching from her perch on the counter as Shin starts doing away with a billion and five layers. )
(nothing to do with expectations, he's really just trying to get comfortable if he's going to spend the night here. the only accessory that remains is his lighter, and now kate knows partly why he hardly ever takes it off. eventually, it's just him - a tank top that shows just how thin he is, jeans, and the necklace, and he comes close to her.
a kiss to her temple, wordless gratitude as he snakes an arm around her to bring her close.)
( It's still a lot of layers, dude. The sacrifices one's skinny ass makes for ~fashion~.
His arm finds her waist as his lips find the side of her head, and this time there's only a momentary pause before she sinks in towards him, one hand coming to rest on his shoulder while the other offers the flask. )
Water?
( To be fair, there's alcohol in the fridge too, but sometimes actual hydration can be nice. )
(sorry, his skinny ass is difficult, but he likes that she's found a little nest on him, a hand coming to gently run on the strands of hair, another kiss pressed to the top of her head.)
( With how she's sitting on the edge of the counter, her legs dangle either side of his, calves brushing against him as they swing idly, fingertip tracing across the curve of his shoulder, aimlessly following lines of bone.
It's strange, to touch someone purely for the sake of touching them, she thinks. There's no real intention behind her actions but the fact that Shin seems to enjoy the affection, and it's better than getting into another argument. )
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 12:25 am (UTC)... I know.
( Follow her. Not that it's very far. They're just going to her apartment building. A quick detour to her flat, because that's not the destination in mind, they're simply going to drop the food off before they head up to the roof.
It's her favourite way to see the city, after all. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 12:35 am (UTC)his own pinky hooks with her own, and he follows without complaint until the breeze of the nightsky floods his lungs at the roof, elbows at the security half-wall so he can take a long look down. maybe she can tell how little he cares about his own mortality, climbing on it to sit, perched, as he takes a cigarette to his lips, fingers caressing the lighter before he burns the tip.
she might notice how his hand remains on the sphere.)
It's nice. Can you pass me my guitar?
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 12:42 am (UTC)But, she supposes it isn't so bad to not keep all of that front on at 100 all the time. Being on the roof comes with that hit of cold night air, an itching to move and explore, but that's not the point of being up here this time.
So, she hands Shin his guitar, joining him on the edge of the wall with an easy hop and the kind of balance that comes with having practiced that motion plenty already. The sky is clear, starless under the lights coming from the city, but she looks up anyway, because sometimes the endlessness of it all has its own kind of anchoring presence. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 01:48 am (UTC)it fills him with wonder, and excitement for the town below, and even deeper he falls in the tune.)
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 07:55 pm (UTC)Bright sunlight, and the red bricks of home. Kate, a couple of years younger, with her head in her phone. A video flickering across the screen until she sets it to one side and nods to herself. Running, forward, to the wall waiting in front of her, and placing her foot on the bricks, pushing herself upwards and grabbing the lip of the wall itself to pull herself up.
That particular rush of success which only comes the very first time you try something new. Giddy and excited, filled with possibility. Forgetting things which came before.
It's easy, from there, to pick out the other good memories: the first time she stuck a landing, flipping off the roof of someone's garage and immediately scarpering from the pissed off owner. Competing with herself on the highest building she could climb up to. Sitting on the safety wall of the multi-storey car park, much like they're doing now.
Bouncing from rooftop to rooftop here in Jigokucho, hands covered in stardust. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 08:37 pm (UTC)they're snippets, anyway. too weak to paint the whole rooftop from her own mind, but enough to make him put his hands on top of his guitar, a beaming smile on his lips as he watches the horizon.)
... So, this power thing isn't so bad, right? I think I should be able to control it better... With time.
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 08:51 pm (UTC)She's smiling when they finally stop. Snippets and flicks though they may be, the effect is almost as potent as actually running a circuit itself. )
You will.
( Of that she has no doubt. That's how most powers work, after all.
And, because happiness lingers, and there's still the echo of a smile on Kate's lips, she adds; )
Looks best up here at sunrise.
( But she may be biased with that one. It's always been her favourite time of day. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 08:54 pm (UTC)Of course it does.
(he keeps the rest of his sentence contained in his throat - a question of whether he'll be here in the morning to see it.)
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 08:58 pm (UTC)( Cheeky.
And, well, she thought that was a given. It is the closest place to go at this point.
But if Shin is going to be cheeky, so is Kate. She leans in, lips brushing his earlobe, and asks the question he keeps silent. )
Wanna see?
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 09:03 pm (UTC)his lips show his smile, and he is really going into a kiss before he halts for a second.)
... Wait. After all this... You still want me in your bed?
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 09:10 pm (UTC)Doesn't have to be in bed.
( KATHERINE. That is not what he means and you know it. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 10:36 pm (UTC)Kate, I'm serious... I'm not good for people. I'm good for nothing. I'm probably going to disappoint you down the line, you know.
(he isn't even thinking of romance. it's not what this is. it feels more comforting than loving, to him. nevermind his own words affecting him with a hit of nausea, his insult turned against him.)
I've lied to you constantly. Doesn't that bother you in the slightest?
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 10:46 pm (UTC)It's not that it's impossible for everything he's said up until now to be a lie. Kate would acknowledge that herself. But it grows less likely with his new powers throwing memories out there for both of them to see. )
'Cause you told me when you didn't want to talk about something?
( If everything he's told her up until now is true, then she's learned more true facts about him since they've met than she knows about most people. Hell, more than she's told him about herself. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 10:50 pm (UTC)I don't think you get it.
(it's cruel, because to some extent, she does... but he's poking where it seems to hurt, anyway. maybe she'll see it then.)
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 11:04 pm (UTC)We're all fuckin' liars, Shin. That's why we're here.
( Liars, thieves, cheats and worse. She doubts hell really pulls in innocent bystanders to fight its faction wars, even if some people here seem to be better at looking like the rose, rather than the serpent under it, than others. )
...Not lookin' for a prince charming, anyway.
( Though, all things considered, he has been pretty charming. But that's not the point of this at all. It's just... nice to have someone who seemed to give half a damn about her.
And besides, she doubts any prince charming would make it through Jigokucho alive. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-21 11:24 pm (UTC)this power comes in handy. the flickers are different, now. his 16th birthday, and all he thinks about is just how amazing it will be to spend the night with the person who shares the same date - like the red thread of destiny is telling them something. of course, the jab he gives nobu and his girlfriend's reaction brings out his worst thoughts, he's not above manipulation when it's called for it. annoyance, anxiety - all he wants is to see hachi, and god only knows if she can come. if takumi would allow her.
and speak of the devil, there he is. a fucking asshole, his blood even boils a little in his veins, burns, but shin's amicable until the bomb drops... much like his heart.
he'll let kate watch it. it's her decision, after all, but he's not really looking at it. he won't look at takumi when he's dead, thank you, it was bad enough when he lived and breathed.
... and then, hachi. relief, love, the feeling of being seen and accepted, with his entire being, when his arms snake around her in their hug, the world becoming quieter in the background.)
All these people you've met today? None should look at me. If you want to take a leap of faith and stay in this friendship, you can, but I think... It's at least wise that you make an educated decision.
cw: slutshaming
Date: 2022-07-21 11:51 pm (UTC)Knowing why she can see those powers he sparks to life, memories and feelings flickering between the two of them which she only half watches. More than anything, her eyes follow Shin. His reactions. Every twitch of expression, the lighting and dimming of his powers.
And then there's that comment, and Kate deflates. Because, oh man. They've had so much come up about their fucked up sex lives (she won't call it love, because that's never what it was for her) that they haven't even touched that part of the mess. Its own can of worms. But those friends never talked about anything close to this. It was never anything but the drinks, the drugs. The idle chatter and gossip about school things that never really let them know each other.
And then she betrayed all of them, or so their side of the argument went. Why'd you stop hanging out with us? Is the whore too good for us? Slag. Those words still come up, were whispered in the blood rain, pulling her back to fights in the hall and teachers shouting after her as she leaves the building.
She draws in a breath, and lets them fade into the same meaningless din they were back in the rain, before reaching out and...
Lightly slapping Shin's shoulder. )
What were it you said earlier? You chose t' do shit?
( The actual quotes don't work well in this context, but the sentiment does. )
I'm choosin' to do this.
( Maybe it's a particularly intense show of faith, given how short a time they've known each other, but it doesn't feel wrong. She's stupid, but she doesn't think she's being stupid here.
Besides, if she is, what's one more heartbreak? One more thing lost in her life? )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-22 09:45 pm (UTC)he elected all of these, even if some of them were atrocious choices, it's not like he can just go back and re-do them, and he wouldn't. he shouldn't even dream to take katherine's choice from her, but then again - at least now she knows the level of fuck-up he is.
and it will die with her for the time being.)
... If you're sure, Katie.
no subject
Date: 2022-07-23 11:50 am (UTC)( A simple, and true, statement. It could have been so easy to tell him to just go, to board up the pieces of her heart peeking through the wall and simply pretend they never so much as spoke.
Sue her, she actually enjoys spending time with his cute ass.
But this night has been a long one, and as much as Kate does enjoy the fresh air and the world above the city, something has broken in the air like heat giving way to summer rains and shelter seems a better option. )
'M goin' back. ( A shrug as she steps past him, heading to the door. ) Y'can crash if you want.
( Or stay up here, or head home. She's made her choice here, and now Shin can make his. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-23 03:55 pm (UTC)(he needs some time to think, so he doesn't follow her. his fingers scroll through his contacts on his phone, but there's really no one else he can go for comfort other than kate herself. strange, isn't it? to be free and not have his person to call when he wants to hear gentle words, even if they're unrelated.
eventually, he makes his way to her place. he's silent as he strips his leather jacket, his belts, his choker, bracelets, the chain that connects his lip to his ear... it'll take a while, here.)
Hey.
no subject
Date: 2022-07-23 04:09 pm (UTC)And the door clicks open. Her gaze slips over, watching from her perch on the counter as Shin starts doing away with a billion and five layers. )
...Hey.
no subject
Date: 2022-07-23 04:12 pm (UTC)a kiss to her temple, wordless gratitude as he snakes an arm around her to bring her close.)
no subject
Date: 2022-07-23 04:21 pm (UTC)His arm finds her waist as his lips find the side of her head, and this time there's only a momentary pause before she sinks in towards him, one hand coming to rest on his shoulder while the other offers the flask. )
Water?
( To be fair, there's alcohol in the fridge too, but sometimes actual hydration can be nice. )
no subject
Date: 2022-07-23 04:26 pm (UTC)(sorry, his skinny ass is difficult, but he likes that she's found a little nest on him, a hand coming to gently run on the strands of hair, another kiss pressed to the top of her head.)
no subject
Date: 2022-07-23 04:35 pm (UTC)There's beer in the fridge.
( With how she's sitting on the edge of the counter, her legs dangle either side of his, calves brushing against him as they swing idly, fingertip tracing across the curve of his shoulder, aimlessly following lines of bone.
It's strange, to touch someone purely for the sake of touching them, she thinks. There's no real intention behind her actions but the fact that Shin seems to enjoy the affection, and it's better than getting into another argument. )
cw eating... issues
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